The issue is what’s bothering you, not you

My perception


All I’m trying to say is what I wrote in the title.
But the fact that you arrived at this article from the internet means that you have some issues to deal with.
So I’d like to explain this in more detail.

This is one of the good ways to navigate your life. When you get used to it, you can deal with all kinds of serious issues calmly. And being calm allows you to solve them or, if also the problem doesn’t go away soon, You can continue to challenge yourself without becoming fatal.

I decided to write this post because I found the key word in the title in my old notebook. I think I’ve written everything I think about.

Don’t worry, I’m not soliciting seminars.

What issues are we talking about?

“You can solve your work, love, and study problems!” I don’t want to write a dubious article like that, but I’ll dare to give as many examples as I can.

That’s because when people are confronted with a issue, they focus on solving it, and they lose their perspective. If you have a problem of love , I think you’ll probably skip the articles that use your work problems as an example.


  • I can’t study well.
  • I can only good at study.
  • I am absorbed in the game.
  • I am being bullied.
  • I can’t figure out a career path.
  • I don’t fit in with my classmates.


  • I’m not sure I’ll get the job at that company.
  • I want to change my job.
  • I don’t feel like I fit in at work.
  • I’m having financial difficulties.
  • I don’t want to work.
  • I was fired.

Love affair

  • I wonder how much that man will like me.
  • I don’t think I’m beautiful in appearance.
  • I want to be loved.
  • He hates me.


  • I’m not sure of my talents.
  • I may be mentally ill.
  • I feel like I want to die.
  • I can’t keep trying.
  • I was diagnosed with an illness.
  • I have to take care of my family.

How to think about it

These are all very serious issues. we don’t want to ask for advice from someone who hasn’t been through the same situation or who isn’t an expert. It’s hard when you’re facing and worrying about these things.

But wait, it’s just that the issue is too serious, too difficult, too unsolvable. So it’s natural to be troubled, and just because you can’t solve it doesn’t mean you’re ineffectiveness.
If you’re struggling, it means you’re realizing that you should at least do something.

But is that something you should worry about before you go to sleep while cutting down on your sleep? Worrying about it when you’re doing something else that requires concentration will solve the problem ? Or should we think about it when we are physically and mentally exhausted?

Worrying feels like a frustrating and stressful thing to do.
But what if I say thinking? Acknowledging that it’s a difficult problem, taking a breath, doing some serious research, thinking, and talking about it is the fastest way to solve it.

Let’s deal with this while reducing the burden

The problem may remain, but it might not need to be solved today. If you have someone who sympathizes with you, that might be enough for you.
You may be worried about the future, but you can’t worry about it after the results are in!

When you’re struggling, you can’t help feeling the stress. If you can “think” about it, you will just get tired instead of feeling stressed. Take a good rest so that you can use the refreshed brain the next day. You will be able to think more deeply.

It may feel like an escape route while you’re struggling, but if you enjoy your favorite hobby, go out to eat, or travel, you may be able to sort it out.

Let’s separate personalities and issues

The superimposition of one’s own personality on a problem is a type of what is called “identification”.

If you’ve read this far and you think you’re on to something, open a book on cognitive behavioral science or psychology. I’m sure the experts will explain it to you. It may be difficult and unfamiliar. But that’s a just the cognitive behavioral science and psychology are difficult. It might be quicker to talk to someone else about it.

I’m not a counselor or an imam

If you think this idea is a good one, please use it. If you are truly convinced, then it’s already your way of thinking.

It’s easy to forget this idea because of the difficulty of the issues, so remake it your own keywords and write them down. I recommend it. It will not only help you now, but also in the future.

The important thing is not to superimpose your personality on the issues.